Defying Desire Read online

  “So how was the party?” Madeline asked.

  “The party was fine. Lots of rich people drinking champagne in pretty clothes,” she responded in what she hoped was a sufficiently cheerful voice.

  “Did you meet anyone?”

  Her mother was dying for Tia to get into a new relationship. And no matter how many times Tia told her that wasn’t going to happen, Madeline kept on saying it.

  “I’m not looking to meet anyone, Mama.”

  “You are a beautiful woman, Tia. And you’re still young. There’s no reason why you can’t give love another chance.”

  No reason except for the severely fractured heart she still carried. “I don’t want another relationship.”

  “You can’t close yourself off because of what happened. Some things are simply meant to be.”

  “You mean my fiancé and my child were meant to die?” she’d unintentionally raised her voice.

  “No. I mean that God doesn’t make mistakes,” Madeline said calmly. “Honey, I know you were terribly hurt, but you’re still living and there’s a reason for that. There’s more life for you to live. You’ve just got to take a step outside and live it.”

  She didn’t know why she said it. Well, yes, she did. She’d heard this speech from her mother too many times to count and she just didn’t feel like hearing it anymore. So the words tumbled out of her mouth without another thought. “My boss’s brother-in-law brought me home.”

  “Really?” Madeline’s voice perked up. “Is he nice-looking?”

  Tia sighed. “That’s an understatement.”

  “Oh. Well, is he single?”

  “Happily so.”

  “Do you like him?”

  “Well enough, I guess.” She was not about to tell her mother that she was in lust with Mr. Trent Donovan. Even though her mother lived in Phoenix Tia was willing to bet she’d heard of Trent and or his family. Beverly Donovan was world renowned for her work with domestic violence organizations, and Tia’s mother volunteered at a local women’s shelter. The shelter would have received some of Beverly’s generous donations. The legend of the Triple Threat Donovans was known up and down the west coast, thanks to the tabloids.

  “So are you going to see him again?”

  Now came the dread. Tia realized she’d just traded one touchy subject for another. “We’re not dating, Mama. He just brought me home.” And stayed the night and sexed me like crazy. Then held me while I trembled from the memories.

  “Maybe you should consider dating him. Or some other man to your liking.”

  Tia came up with an excuse and got off the phone then. Continuing to talk about Trent with her mother was only making matters worse. Nothing serious was going to come of her being with him so there was really no use putting those ideas in Madeline’s head.

  Bringing her mind back to the matter at hand, Tia once again looked at the computer screen. All last week she’d attempted to go into a baby store to buy a gift for Jade’s baby shower. But each time she’d come up to the door she’d stopped. Her heart had raced, her hands shaking and sweating. She couldn’t do it.

  Before, she’d decorated the prettiest room for Jessica in the softest lavender, yellow and pink. Her crib had been a vanilla-colored cascade with white lace bedding. The carpet mauve, the drapes pink with yellow balloons. And in the corner was a white rocker where she would sit to rock Jessica to sleep. Inhaling deeply, Tia could still smell the distinctive baby scent that filtered through the room. She’d loved to go in there early in the morning, before the sun or Jake had risen. She’d imagine Jessica asleep in the crib as she touched the sheets.

  Teardrops fell onto her hand, rolling down her fingers to land on the black keyboard. Clearing her throat and sitting up straight in the chair, Tia reached for a tissue to clean off her hand and her keyboard, then attempted to focus once more.

  Going into a baby store again was out of the question. Thank goodness for the Internet. For the last hour since she’d returned from a fitting with Camille, she’d been perusing Web sites selling baby products.

  Jade was having twins. They hadn’t found out the sex because, as Camille had told her, Linc wanted to be surprised. So whatever she purchased would have to be unisex.

  She found a great gift basket full of all things baby-oriented and was trying to decide between that and a double stroller when there was a knock at her door.

  Glancing at the clock she noted it was a little after seven and wondered who could be visiting her at this hour. Other than Camille and Dana, Tia didn’t have many social visitors.

  Tia peered through the peephole and her breath caught as she saw his chest first—and, man, what a chest; it should be a sin to be as finely built as this man—then his face. It wasn’t enough that he played into her one indulgence, physical fitness. No, he had to be fine as hell to boot. She wasn’t quite sure if it was the mixture of milk-chocolate-toned skin and dark penetrating eyes or the strong jaw and tempting mouth that made her the hottest. At any rate she was all but drooling with one eye pressed against the door and she felt ridiculous.

  Pulling the door open she steadied her breathing and tried for a casual smile. “Hi.”

  For a few seconds he only stood there, staring at her with that look that made her feel naked no matter how many clothes she wore. Since she had no plans of going out tonight she wore an old Lakers jersey over shorts that were too short to wear outside. Usually being with or without clothes didn’t rattle her because as a model she was used to undressing and dressing in front of strangers. But Trent’s glare made her nervous.

  “Hi, yourself,” he said suddenly, then stepped inside, his hands instantly going around her waist as he backed her into the apartment. “Remind me to thank Kobe Bryant later,” he said just before his lips landed on hers, stealing the breath she was about to take.

  Chapter 9

  His tongue stroked hers as if that were its sole purpose. Soft and gentle, then probing and insistent, he moved his lips over hers, all the while his hands slid from her waist to cup her bottom.

  Tia heard the door slam, then felt herself being lifted from the floor. Without breaking the kiss she willingly wrapped her legs around his waist, clasping them at the ankles. He moved through the apartment, stopping only when he bumped into the kitchen counter where he placed her.

  “I have this same jersey at home,” he said in a gruff voice while his fingers went to the edges of the jersey and lifted it upward. “But it doesn’t look half as good on me,” he finished after he’d removed the jersey.

  Now he stared down, then back up to her face with what looked like defeat. “Why do you have this on?” he asked referring to the tank top she wore.

  “Huh?” she asked confused and still trying to catch her breath. She barely knew where she was, let alone what he was saying. The last clear memory she had was sitting at the computer looking for a baby shower gift. Now it appeared she was on the kitchen counter, her jersey thrown on the floor and him staring at her quizzically.

  “You’re wearing too many damned clothes,” he complained.

  She looked down, then picked up on his meaning and laughed. “I don’t usually walk around naked anticipating a man to knock on my door and want sex.”

  Placing his palms on either side of her on the counter Trent lowered his head and took a deep breath.

  “Sorry,” he said finally, looking up at her again. “I meant to stop by to say hello and see if you’d eaten dinner yet.”

  Tilting her head Tia nodded. “Uh-huh.”

  “Really,” he insisted. “I did not come here intending to ravish you.”

  She arched a brow. “So you don’t want sex?”

  He grinned, a wide, tooth-filled grin that scraped along the bumpy surface of her heart.

  Each time she’d seen Trent he’d had this intense look about him. Even when they’d made love that night he was focused, on her pleasure and his. Never had she seen him happy or relaxed. She was surprised right now, he looked both.r />
  “I didn’t say all that.”

  Because the look was infectious, she smiled, as well. “That’s what I thought.” Using her hands she pushed herself off the counter then waited for him to back up. Which he didn’t so their bodies remained crunched together.

  “Um, the answer to your question is no, I haven’t eaten yet. Do you plan on feeding me before or after you ravish me?” Because the mere thought of him touching her sounded almost as good as a nice hot meal.

  He’d put those hypnotic hands on her again, this time they moved down her outer thighs, around front and back up again until one hand was cupping her juncture and the other was moving steadily to grasp her breast. “Let’s order pizza, then head to the bedroom. By the time we’re finished with round one the food should be here.”

  Tia couldn’t help but chuckle with excitement. In the two years since Jake’s death she’d had sex a couple of times with men that interested her only a little. Those encounters were solely for physical purposes and left her neither happy nor particularly excited to indulge in them again.

  With Trent it had been the total opposite. She wanted him to touch her, to kiss her, to carry her off to her bedroom and make love to her again and again. The added bonus that his desire for her was exhilarating only enhanced the anticipated pleasure.

  To show that she was game for his suggestion she slipped a hand between them cupping his thick erection in her palm, then leaned forward to nip at his bottom lip. “There are menus in the bottom drawer over there. I like my pizza with extra cheese.”

  Giving his arousal a teasing squeeze, she moved away from him, taking off her tank top and tossing it in his direction as she left the kitchen.

  He wasn’t lying. He’d come over to check on her. After his conversation with his father and brothers yesterday Trent had decided that staying away from Tia was not an option.

  On the drive over here he’d considered all the information he’d found on her and decided to deal with that as needed. If she didn’t bring it up, neither would he. They enjoyed sex with each other. There was no need to complicate that. The fact that she hadn’t called him in the last three days, well, he intended to bring that up when he had her where he wanted her.

  He’d decided that even though he didn’t want any type of committed relationship, going three days without hearing or seeing her wasn’t going to work. His body was on overdrive, his sex leading him around with only one destination in mind.

  It was with that in mind that Trent hastily moved to the drawer she’d indicated, picked up the phone and placed their order. In minutes he was heading into the bedroom, his clothes coming off as he went.

  By the time he’d entered the bedroom he wore only boxers. He stopped the moment he spied her in the center of the bed.

  She was naked, gloriously, blessedly naked. Her golden skin highlighted by the dark brown comforter on the bed. The pillows were propped up behind her, one leg lying straight, the other lifted so that her foot was planted flat on the mattress. Her hair was loose, her eyes cast in a sheen of desire as she lifted a finger, beckoning him to come forward.

  Trent’s mind roared, his erection poking swiftly through the slit in his boxers. He took one step towards her, then turned back, found his pants and retrieved the condoms he’d placed in his wallet. Moving forward he tossed them on the nightstand, keeping one in his hand, then climbed onto the bed.

  “What took you so long?” she asked reaching up for him.

  “You wanted extra cheese, remember?” He grinned down at her then took her lips. Kissing her was like a burst of sunshine. Each time his lips touched hers his entire body lit up from the inside out. No matter what he had been thinking or feeling, the touch of her lips set off a warm, sensuous feeling in him that Trent was quickly becoming addicted to.

  Adjusting himself over her he pushed her back farther then felt her reaching into his hand to take the condom.

  “Let’s get you suited up first,” she said pulling her mouth away from his.

  With her hands on his shoulders she pushed him back enough so that she could grab his erection. “You’re being awfully bossy today,” he said, then followed up with a moan as she stroked his length.

  “You came here for food and sex so we might as well get down to business.”

  She’d released him only to remove the condom from the pack and Trent stilled with her words. They were casual, said with an air of teasing, yet he wasn’t quite pleased with them. The thought that this was just a happy-go-lucky sexual encounter didn’t sit as comfortably with him as it had on the drive over.

  Tia had finished suiting him up and was stroking one hand over his length while her other hand slipped between her legs, touching herself as she touched him. All thought of what type of encounter this was fled from Trent’s mind.

  His gaze fell to her center watching intently as her fingers grazed over her aroused flesh. Arching her back she moaned, continuing to sweetly torture both of them. Wrapping his hand around her wrist Trent pulled her fingers away from her center, lifting them slowly to his mouth. One at a time and in a motion so slow he could memorize it, he licked the damp digits clean.

  She’d watched him, her other hand moving methodically over his erection as she did. Placing her free hand alongside its mate at his groin, Trent touched the smooth center of her, letting his fingers move downward until parting her nether lips was inevitable. She was already open to him, already wet and waiting. His finger slid slowly, sinuously over her aroused flesh and his breath caught.

  He’d known the moment he’d first seen her that this was what he wanted to do to her. What he hadn’t counted on was how frequently he would want to do it.

  “Three days is too long,” he whispered.

  Her mouth opened slightly, her tongue slipping out to move seductively over her lips. “You could have come sooner,” she answered with eyes intent on his.

  “Did you want me sooner?”

  She lifted her hips silently coaxing his finger to delve deeper. Trent pulled back hovering just above where she wanted him.

  Her fingers tightened on his length, one hand slipping back to cup his sac. “I wanted you on the first day.”

  Trent growled, dipping his finger finally into her waiting center. She arched her back, her sweet walls clenching his finger tightly. “We won’t wait this long again,” he promised.

  “Agreed,” she answered pumping with the motions of his hand.

  His fingers slipping easily in and out of her was driving Trent insane. Her hand wrapped securely around his arousal pushed him steadily over the edge.

  “Enough,” he said roughly, removing his hands from her center and moving out of her reach. With a flexing of his hips Trent entered her with a deep stroke. She gasped, then wrapped her legs securely around his waist, settling in for the ride.

  And ride her he did, thrusting so deep inside her he would swear they were connected. His eyes closed, the muscles in his shoulders bunching as he worked her. God, she was fantastic. Never in a million years would he have thought he’d enjoy sex this intensely with a woman.

  Still, this felt somehow different, more gratifying on so many levels. Tia raised herself up so that they were sitting in the middle of her bed, arms, legs and centers entangled. She now rode while he pumped in conjunction with her movements. It was exhilarating to say the least as they both moaned and kissed. Their hearts beat rapidly, their minds solely focused on each other’s mutual pleasure.

  Nothing in her file had revealed what a sex goddess she was. There was no hint, no warning that if he touched her he’d become addicted, wanting, no, needing to feel her honeyed walls grasping him on a daily basis. Wanting her sweet lips on his, her tongue tangling with his own more often than not.

  For the first time in Trent’s life he wasn’t prepared, wasn’t equipped to deal with the onslaught of desire. And when her legs shivered, her entire body trembling over his, she screamed out his name and he fell.

  His mind went blank, b
ut his soul began to fill, with what he couldn’t quite explain. His name was a litany on her lips, wrapping around him, cloaking him as he drifted, plunged, then emptied his very essence.

  On a ragged moan he pulled her even closer. Her hair draped them both as he rested his head on her chest. Hearing her rapid heartbeat melding with his own, Trent felt the first ebbings of dread and something a Navy SEAL should never encounter, fear.

  Strings of gooey cheese stretched from her mouth to the slice of pizza Tia steadily pulled away from her. Breaking it with her fingers she licked her lips and proceeded to chew. The look of pure bliss that covered her face was almost equivalent to the moment when she’d climaxed.

  Trent simply watched, completely fascinated by the effect watching her eat was having on him. He’d had dinner with women before, watched them sit across from him and consume anything from a bird-like salad to a whole lobster, but none of that seemed to compare to Tia.

  When his breathing had steadied enough so that he could speak coherently he’d lifted her from the bed, carrying her into the shower where they stood under the warm cascade of water. Like two teenagers they’d giggled and played as soapy hands attempted to cleanse each other’s body. Only once did Trent give in to the urge and kiss her, long and deep with her back plastered against the cool tiled wall. It was then that she’d pulled away and complained of being hungry.

  So they’d gotten out of the shower just minutes before the pizza guy appeared at the door. Now they were sitting, Trent in his boxers and Tia in her Bryant jersey once more, at the dinette table in her makeshift dining room. He’d mentioned her lack of furniture and she’d simply shrugged, saying “Less is more.” The flippant remark had been just on the outskirts of desolate but Trent refused to delve any further. The need to know the reasons behind each word she said, each action she took, was becoming a habit of his that he wasn’t sure he liked.